Archive for the ‘Fat Day Fun’ Category

• My Life Without Butter

  The cool thing about  having a blog is you can write about random shit no one really cares about and someone, SOME WHERE will get what you are saying and maybe give a shit.  This brings me to today’s post about me, RM1 giving up butter.

  Let me begin by defining for you what “giving up” means.  It means not having any.  Not even inside some other shit I like…for example cornbread.  Yep.  I love cornbread and I put butter in it and on it.   No cornbread for me and tonight I had chile for dinner.  Without cornbread.

  For those of you who may be new to Renegade Moms let me catch you up to speed.  I love butter.  I love it a lot.  It is basically the best tasting thing on the planet and I have the ass to prove how much I love it.  What I don’t love is how huge my ass has become and the time has come to do something about it.  I lost 12 pounds recently and not only did I gain it all back it brought one more friend.  I also feel  like shit.  I feel old and tired and fat and tired and lame and tired and to tell the truth I’m tired of being tired. I also don’t want to buy bigger jeans or wear ReneDad’s jeans.  I eat like shit.  RM2 recently has been purging her system and doing amazing and I realize I have to start somewhere.  So my somewhere is with my favorite thing: butter. So four days ago I stopped eating butter and to tell the truth I am starting to feel better.  Whaddaya know.  Cool.

  The first 48 hours were brutal.  I did not time this whole butter purge very well because the first 48 hours coincided with my period. Yeah, not smart I know.  However, I worked through the 12 Steps of butter addiction and I came out on the winning side.  I learned to make something new that has saved my life: Yogurt dressing and I have used it on my veggies and my baked taters and on my chicken and it was super good.  RM2 taught me if I fry my egg and put it on my toast I don’t need butter.  It’s true.  I tried it and it works.  It’s really good with lemon pepper.   At night I don’t eat baked shit I drink jasmine tea (also courtesy of RM2 and as much of a skeptic as I was i did it and now I can’t live without it at night).

  So there you have it, even someone as bad as me can be taught.  I am not saying I am giving up butter forever.  Just long enough to develop a real appreciation for what living without it feels like.   Eventually I will have some again but I will only need a little and it will taste SOOOO good!  I have to warn you all that my inner hippie is going to take over the other side of me that likes Pop Tarts.  I’m giving those up too.  I’m changing people and I hope you still like me.  I promise not to get all self righteous on you and I promise I will still yell at my kids.  I just don’t want to feel like shit while I do it.  Does that work for you?  Oh and I hope Paula Deen will still want to adopt me.

  Thanks!

  ~RM1

  Share on Facebook

  2010.03.28 / 7 responses / Category: Daily Confession, Fat Day Fun

• Twit-light Mean Mom
• Potty Training for Mom
• Of Course it Happens to Me
• Practicality is the Best Gift Ever
• It’s Not Easy Being Green

• Daily Confession
• Fat Day Fun
• Free Fun Friday
• Other Renegade Shit
• Pinchin' a Dooce- When the urge to purge strikes!
• Random Disasters
• Wednesday Hump Grub

• Checking the Electrical Box
• Dooce "Fans"
• Life's Crazy Joke
• Mommy Wants Vodka
• Mommy X
• Pajamas and Coffee
• Poop on Peeps
• Redneck Mommy
• Shindig
• The Bloggess

• June 2010
• May 2010
• April 2010
• March 2010
• February 2010
• January 2010
• December 2009
• November 2009
• October 2009
• September 2009
• August 2009
• July 2009
• June 2009
• May 2009