• Why Do I Do This to Myself? Why?

     

    I have four kids.  

    That means four damn birthday parties every damn year.

    Me.

    Tommorow is Wylde’s birthday party and because he went and had the nerve to be born in November I am having to have it at my house, IN my house because it’s raining. Damnit!  This means I have to clean my house. Not the half ass bullshit cleaning I usually do but the real deal.  

    This sucks. 

    Every single time I try to get super organized and tackle one room a day for a week so that the day of the party I just do food and then I’m done.  It NEVER EVER happens that way.  I always end up getting up super early the day of the party and cleaning my ass off all morning, then throwing the food together while stressing the hell out only to jump in the shower 30 seconds before the first guest arrives.  This year seems to be no exception.  The party is tomorrow and there are only two things crossed off my list and what am I doing right now? Yes I am writing a blog post, then twittering about how much I DON’T feel like cleaning this shit-hole up instead of actually cleaning this shit-hole up. Smart huh? Yep, I’m a genius.

    I am working on consolidating this whole birthday party business.  This is the last and only year Wylde and Zen will have their own separate birthday parties. Next year and forever they will share a party since Zen’s birthday is a month after Wylde’s big day.  That turns four parties into three.  Then I decided this year that Princess has been a birthday party ingrate for the last three birthdays so her birthday party days are over and I don’t give a rat’s ass that next year is her “Sweet 16″ since as far as I am concerned there is nothing “sweet” about it.  Sixteen year old girls are anything but sweet. She can make up her own party that is not at my house as long as it doesn’t involve a keg. That knocks it down from three parties to two parties.  Pretty good huh?

    The reality of it all is that it doesn’t even matter how many times I have to do this a year I will still never be ready on time, I will still be stressed out and tired and I will never do it the way I plan it. I will always find things during the week before the party that I would rather do (like this) and I will always be late. I will never eat the food I make at the party until that night after the party.  I won’t pee until everyone leaves.  I won’t sit down or get to say more than “hi” to everyone there. I will always wish that I could find a better way to do this and every year I will be irritated with myself for not sticking to my “plan” that I knew I wouldn’t stick to.

    Yeah. I suck.

    ~RM1

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    Category: Random Disasters | Tags: